Girls and Love

Something that annoys me is that to the extent girls are supposed to have sexual desires, they are supposed to be motivated by love rather than pleasure. Love is a dangerous thing—it involves being willing to sacrifice for the other person, a willingness that is imprudent if one lacks understanding. For the rewards of being loved being what they are, there are a great many who try to trick others into loving them, notwithstanding they don’t deserve it. It’s a rare girl who understands herself and others sufficiently for it to be prudent for her to give herself away from love. Evolution doesn’t select particularly well against girls loving for reasons unnatural to themselves because unlike being the sort of person who is willing to be unselfish, unselfishness is by definition not rewarding in a pleasant sense. The difference between a girl having sex because she is deluded into thinking it incredibly pleasant sexually and between her having it because she knows correctly that it actually is incredibly pleasant sexually is like the difference between hell and heaven—girls will be expected to be highly evolved in not making the wrong choice, because ones that do make the wrong choice especially die out along with their offspring of (usually) miserable brats, while those who do make the right choice tend to get awesome well-loved children tending to leave lots of offspring. But the difference between giving sexually from true love and giving sexually from having been tricked into love is only like the difference between hell and heaven insofar as its effects on humanity are concerned. So far as a girl is concerned, giving from love is unselfish and thus (by definition) not particularly rewarding either way. The only reason it could be expected for girls to evolve to be sexually unselfish from love would be if lovers or other people rewarded them for by nature being willing to be thus unselfish. But why would males or people in general reward girls well for being loving when loving for the wrong reasons can be such a bad thing for humanity that it is probably not really prudent for girls to be especially loving?

Girls just sort of assume that men would want them to be loving. This was something I was noticing just a few weeks ago when a family trip caused me to have to eat out more than usual. When I see an attractive girl at a restaurant or whatever, of course I look upon her nicely with my pious look. But doing this, it occurred to me that one girl was trying to convince me that she too was loving and gentle-like. She just sort of assumed that my being a more loving sort of pious person meant I believed girls should be that way, too. And all it did was make her afraid and feel like thinking of me while leaning on her dad I guess he was. And then the next time I had occasion to look all gentlemanly-like at a girl sitting across from me she just sort of looked like she was trying to convince me that I wasn’t smart not to realize it be funner to not try to be pious when considering girls. It’s as though when evaluating me she decided if she didn’t convince me to realize sex can be funner unholy and lustful, she wouldn’t have any fun, and she wasn’t optimistic because my piety was real. I think she wondered whether I must be one of those jealous Taliban sorts who of course don’t claim to like lust in sex (because they don’t want their wives to be tempted to stray). I won’t pretend those girls were irresistibly attracted to me sufficiently to have paid very close attention, and not that I studied them sufficiently to be certain of the subtleties of their expressions, but I can’t help wondering whether if there were some way I could evince my tendency to be loving and pious without particularly giving the impression I want girls to do otherwise than to seek their own pleasure, I might fairly be almost irresistible, which might be a cool thing even with laws being what they are. Most girls are just not discriminating enough to realize that men with holy feelings for them really don’t want the girls to be holy; in fact, the more unholy girls are, the more they inspire holiness, probably. It’s the do-unto-others-as-you-would-have-them-do-unto-you error—an error born of a rule that doesn’t work when people have differing needs. Girls are not pleased by guys full of unholy lust screwing them in a way that is indifferent to their own pleasure, and so mostly they just sort of assume it be bad and selfish to desire a male in a mainly sensual and mostly purely pleasure-seeking unholy way. I wouldn’t care if girls be selfish when having sex with me; it’s sex, that’s great for males anyway one looks at it, and in fact, if they aren’t selfishly seeking their own pleasure, they are likely to get too afraid, thereby indeed decreasing the fun for everybody.

People tend to be not very clear in their head what exactly constitutes depravity. Most people lump together lust and depravity using the word “fucking” and assume that this makes them ghetto clever, the way some people do because they feel they are in the know because they watch shows on HBO where every third word is “fuck”. Well, no. If a girl “fucks” a male by giving in to her unholy lustful emotions and aggressively seeking for herself sexual pleasure in bed, she is not being unkind to her lover the way a sodomizer is unkind to a girl he might sodomize. She in fact is giving him something very special. Lives are well-nigh ruined by not appreciating what sexual love is. A husband has an affair with female; she’s full of lust but maybe (she thinks) just because she thinks she can gain something over him by “fucking” him. Husband comes to have holy-desiring emotionally loving feelings for mistress, maybe because she is worth it, or maybe because his wife is worth it. But most people don’t understand that holiness is a sexual emotion, and so husband just sort of assumes it immoral to feel holy feelings for more than one female, the way it is mostly immoral to care for several females, and so he feels he has to choose, and of course he chooses where his interests lie. It’s all pointless. The more a male is holy (unless chemicals from a woman force him to be otherwise), the more he is loving to anybody he has sex with—wife, mistress or whatever. Very possibly, the husband feels holiness for the mistress mainly because he loves his wife too much to be unholy; but it is not very possible he’ll be clever enough to realize this. And the wife? Oh, if she finds out, and if the mistress is pretty and young enough, likely the wife will have a sudden increase in lust. But she won’t interpret this as “yeah, now I can have the extra fun of sex in an orgy”. No, of course not, people are too stupid. She’ll just think she wants to fuck her husband and mistress’s brains out akin to the controlling way guys sodomize wives and those they cheat with when jealousy makes them feel like it; and she’ll assume her husband has holy feelings for his mistress because she fucked them into him. She’ll interpret her emotions as hateful ones and seek divorce. Meanwhile, a daughter, unless she figures out the truth, will not be quite sure whether fuck is some kind of wretched disease that has destroyed her family or whether it’s a fuck-or-be-fucked world out there; in the first case, she won’t be as affectionate as she should be and will tend to get in the way by way of “rescuing” people from fucking, in the second case, she’s not likely to make wise reproductive decisions.

What her own sexual pleasure demands of a girl is very close to what love demands of her (according to my theory of nymphetal philokalia). Her own love indeed is important to her, but mainly because if she feel no love, then for sure that is a strong sign her pleasure isn’t real. If a girl really wants to feel love, she should prudently be led by her sexual pleasure first, for that will likely lead her to feel more love than if she be led by her love first.