Tuesday, June 20, 2006

What I am feeling

Here's a post that describes my mystical feelings for the most attractive girl as best understood yesterday (which is but a poor understanding, at least at this point). I stopped in the middle, partly because I need to get a clearer handle on how the encryption works (lest people think I feel by carelessly having sex also with a wrong woman I might, I don't know, create a wicked witch of the west or east or whatever), and partly because I feel that holiness and other scientifically understandable down-to-earth matters concerning love are important, and if I get too mystical, well, my love won't be as pure or desirable. This morning, right now, I don't feel like mysticism. It may well be also I should think more carefully about perception, reflection, etc., since to understand this mystical love emotion I especially would seem to need clear thinking there, at least to be very efficient. Perhaps this love can even be useful to me in refining my philosophy concerning understanding (in the Locke sense).

What I am feeling

It is a faint perception
an image as it were
Of an ideal relationship
Not just in some technical sense,
not in a well-defined sense
but the whole thing
that is important
and right.

God needs it
Or some higher thing
or some spirit,
more likely all three,
or something like that.

Whence did it come?
I know not.
It came all at once.
From within?
It seemed so shortly after then,
and has not seemed something else more clearly since.
The percept came complete
or perhaps just when noticed
it appeared complete?

What was it?
A sense of something incredibly special and beautiful
yet so faint
I can’ be sure
it was not my imagination
fancying something imaginary behind base level noise
yet I guess not because observing it did put me in some higher
state of profundity
without concomitant insanity.

What be my natural inclination to consider its pragmatic purpose?
God, higher reality, or whatever needs me to try to bring about a reality
corresponding in the main to the percept.
For the higher good.
It was my percept that God needs us to have this relationship as in image.
A matter of copying image?
Image is very difficult to observe.
Mostly, it must be observed and not analyzed
as much as I tend.
Is it wrong to not obey?
Obviously, I must put my own sense of right into this because I was not intended to be a robot.
Or a zombie.
But the main points
I must obey
because they are beautiful
I want to.
I know higher reality needs what is therein to happen.
It was my percept.
A faculty of my own
What produced it
I know
Obedience is obedience to myself.

Of what did the percept consist?
Mostly of her image and with an aura.

Whose image?
The beautiful girl whose picture I saw.
What is its significance?
That is the person who possesses the aura.
How do I know?
They were together, one.
What was the aura?
I think it is some sort of sub-atomic phenomena.
A guess it is that it surrounds her DNA in a definite pattern
I’d say quantum states of something, but I don’t like quantum physics.
What was it like, this aura?
It was like a red crystal,
spread out sort of linearly,
dark red with a lighter pinkish shade just enough not to be boring.
Sort of a liquidy red diamond, but not pure red, and lined up all in a row with definite binary pattern to it.
What do you think it be?
That it would be a kind of genetic code for characteristics coded for on a subatomic or even sub-universe level—a finer reality than physics understands.
What be the nature of these characteristics?
Methinks they be spiritual or even magical in nature.
Why be this aura, this code, in the image.
Somehow it involves sex, I think.
Sex? Why?
Because perception of the image was erotic?

Because, well, I can’t be sure, but there is the impression,
a faint wispy impression I don’t understand
that the percept also contained ideas?
But all mixed together
With the other parts of the image
a general jumble
no particular location for just one
What idea?
That some sort of close presence
betwixt us
would produce something remarkable.
Well, I can’t be sure, but I think, though I can’t be sure that
she would gain magical powers,
Magical powers?
Yes, she would gain magical powers, not too different I think from that of the good witch of the north on the Wizard of Oz.
The direction is not supposed to refer to anything.

How do you know?

All that’s in the image about that is she will turn into something with a magical quality reminding me of the magical powers one is inclined to think one is meant to believe the Good Witch of the North is supposed to have when one sees her in the movie with her wand.

Only she is more beautiful than the actress (not that the actress was bad looking, but...), because she stays herself basically.

Yes, basically.

Not completely?

No, obviously not. Her soul, which I suppose is encoded on that level (it seems a reasonable inference that probably there is a lower level than the soul, but this experience I had is not about that level presumably) gets transformed where the interference is right with the aura pattern in the precept?

Say what?

How does this happen?

I need to have a grasp of the percept,

The universal God machine or whatever
does check I presume just how well the information encoded in the information in the idea corresponds to reality,
and if it does, it proceeds.

Proceeds to what?

To take the message encoded in the information of the percept (whether encoded or not) and to code akin to quantum encryption (an interference type) the desired image in such a way that it can only be read significantly to the extent it is read on the real image, which consists of the actual aura pattern of her soul together with the actual events of the relationship as it transpired, which of course will be different from the ideal events of the relationship as in the percept.
So what happens if the relationship is better for the higher universe in some respects than that in the

Then I hope something better will happen, but maybe the universal blobs of the higher universe ???? are not smart enough. Hard to say, actually.

OK. So why is the pattern of ideal transformation also encoded by her actual genetic pattern?

[Comment this morning: the previous sentence seems like a typo. Perhaps I should have said "Why is the pattern of ideal transformation only entirely readable on her actual genetic pattern?"]
Probably to keep third parties from wanting to share in the metamorphosis an intimate relationship had while possessing the percept could give.

So if some bad female has sex with you while you are transforming the beautiful girl into the Good Witch of the North, there is not much danger really of her becoming the Wicked Witch of the West (or East).

No, it wouldn’t seem so. It stands to reason the only part of her that could be transformed would be that part of her (original) aura that resembles the original aura of the beautiful girl. Come to think of it, quantum encryption perhaps would be silly, the percept could just contain a signal that adds to the aura code the corresponding part of the percept code. Yes, now I see it is more reasonable to suppose the aura code is the signal and the ideal part of the relationship code is akin to a password. A password that works to the extent the relationship is ideal and therefore resembling of it (the password). I don’t know whether it’s that simple though.

Would this destroy her soul?

No, the percept aura code appears mostly empty space. Kind of short parts. Presumably it is just in the necessary spaces where her magic powers are most appropriate, needed, or possible that she would be transformed.

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